Sunday Snapshot

Some random activity at our house - 

A Time to Dance

There are those in the adoption community who choose not to celebrate the day their children came to their family. That by celebrating the day, it somehow diminishes or ignores the loss our adopted children undergo. They have a point - we should not, as adoptive parents, ignore that our children have come into our families by loss or other tragic circumstance.

However, I believe it is like being adopted into the family of God - a time to celebrate a new beginning, a new life, a second chance. For many adopted children - a life saving second chance. I do not believe that by celebrating the day God brought my children into our lives I diminish their loss 

A time to weep and a time to laugh

a time to mourn and a time to dance

Today is a day we dance - it is the 3rd anniversary of the day a precious child went from orphan to daughter

How far that child has come as she has received the love of a family - just as we flourish as we receive the love of our Savior, so she has blossomed as she drinks in the love of her family and friends. With every breath today I am reminded of His great Love for her and for us - that we may be reborn as we accept the invitation into God's family just as this little orphan was reborn that afternoon three years ago when she was placed into the family hand picked for her by a God who loves her more than we can imagine. 

Becky - we thank God every day that He brought you to us that day. Our lives have been blessed beyond belief by your presence and your smile. 

A Milestone -

Today was another Milestone in the continuing saga of the Yingling Family. Today - number one son - graduated high school. Yes - high school. That cute, sweet little boy is now a high school graduate! 

At the beginning of the processional - poor kid spotted me with the camera...it would haunt him for the rest of the ceremony. This would mark the first time (of 3 or 4) I got teary - I just kept seeing him at 8.....and now, here he is - almost all grown up! 

 Getting up & getting ready to get it done! 

 Spotted the paparazzi.....

 Diploma received!!! 

 The graduate! 

 WIth his fans......

 Dad got a little nostalgic - or just silly! 

 Matt, 

We are so proud of all you accomplished! You persevered even when you didn't want to and finished the race strong. You set a goal and reached it with your usual style and flair!  We are excited for you and can't wait to see what the future holds for you! 

Daddy's Helpers

I am pretty sure there will come a day when they will not be nearly as willing to help, so for now....he lets them! It does take about 10 times as long to get the cans down, but we are hoping it sets a good precedent! 

Pajama Day

Tuesday was "Pajama Day" at Becky's school.  I was able to snap a few photos at drop off! She has a really great class this year - 1/2 of who are returning next year. 

Advocating for my Child

Recently, I saw a writing contest that asks the question "When did you first understand the meaning of love?". This is an interesting question for adoptive parents, as for many of us, coming to love our children - especially those adopted as older kids-is a process with many layers. We love the idea of them while they are waiting for us, we love watching the transformation from orphan to loved child, we love them as we develop a relationship with them. One day - we find that we love them with a ferociousness and we feel we have arrived at the true parent/child love relationship.

I am there.

It's Ferocious. 

It's rearing its head with a lion's roar and a focus of a momma bear getting food for her child. 

As some of you know, we are in a dispute with our school district about Katie's goals and placement. Without going into the (somewhat ugly) details, we believe our child is capable of so much more than they are offering. We believe that she was damaged by her time in an orphanage in China, requiring more nurturing and compassion and tenderness in her teaching. We believe she deserves to be encouraged and challenged and educated. They believe that using stalling tactics and foot dragging to hold her back in a class that is beneath her is the right path for her. 

I believe that God knew exactly what we would be facing - and He is using this challenge to draw us closer to our child - building that parent/child relationship in a way that perhaps only adversity can. I believe that He is calling on us to advocate for her - to fight the fight that no one fought for her for 4 years in China. I believe He has equipped us with resources and people to help us. 

My Child spent 4 years suffering from decisions adults made that were best for them - I will not stand by and allow MY child's needs be second to the needs of teachers egos, administrations or bureaucratic nonsense. 

She is MY child- and I believe in her. 

I will fight to get her what she needs - today, tomorrow and the day after that. 

The day to day

In looking back over the past few months or so of our blog, I have noticed a disturbing habit I have fallen into it. I am only recording the "big" and memorable moments and in doing so, I am missing the day to day joy of being who we are. Our blog is titles "Casa De Alegria" - or" House of Joy" - and yet I am missing it. If I am not capturing it here, then chances are it is blasting by me in real life too. I don't want to be the mom who looks back years from now and doesn't remember the little joys and can't smile at the small delights of her children's childhoods. So I will try harder to record and remember the day to day joys of our lives.

God's Plans

Sometimes, we pray and God says "yes" - we immediately see an answer. It is often better than we imagine and we delight in the fulfillment of our desire. We praise God and are reminded of His power and His love for us.

Sometimes, we pray, and we clearly hear God say "wait". We settle in and wait, comfortable in the circumstance and knowing we rest securely in the Hands of our Father. We chant to ourselves and others "His timing, not ours". We praise Him, and are reminded that "He has a plan for us...a plan for good."

Sometimes, though, we hear "no". and we are confused. You see, we have prayed for something that is good, that would glorify Him, that would serve His Kingdom. Our faith is tested. We wonder how a "good and loving" God would shut the door on something that is clearly so good.

Then He, in His infinite wisdom, sometimes chooses to reveal the reason for his "no" - and often it is because He had something better for us. Something bigger for us to do. Something that would reveal His mercies and power so much better. 

He has done that - once again - in our lives. For several months now, we have been seeking God in different potential adoption scenarios. Each time, He has gently but firmly (ok - one time wasn't so gentle) shut the door and told us "no". I confess, I didn't understand. Here we were, ready and willing, to adopt a child that was in a hard place. We were trusting that He would help and instead, He told us "no". 

In His mercy, we now understand He had something else planned - and in His infinite wisdom it is awesome.

Through the miracle of modern technology, we were made aware of a little girl in China who had lived in an orphanage since she was 2. Since she was found on the street screaming literally on fire. Who has lived with disfiguring and debilitating burns for the past 7 years. Through some God ordained orchestrating, an amazing mom with a daughter from the same SWI arranged for her to get the surgeries she needed by one of the best surgeons in the country...who happens to practice in Los Angeles. All she needs is a foster family to care for her for at least a year (and probably more) while she receives her surgeries. 

Turns out she is from a place about an hour from where Becky is from.

Turns out while the surgery center is in North LA (about 2 hours from us), the surgeon also has a practice in Santa Ana - about 20 minutes from us. 

Turns out her first name is "Ai" - same as Becky's. 

Turns out this is what God had planned for us.

Turns out we will be a family with 5 kids instead of 4 (at least for a year - maybe more.) 

Here is what we know about our newest family member --

She is 9 years old and has lived at the SWI since she was 2. She is badly disfigured from burns and has had some life saving surgery but not much more, As she grows up, the scar tissue is beginning to pull and tear at the skin around her eyes, and she is not able to close her mouth or chew properly. Child Burn Foundation has unbelievably stepped to the plate to cover all of her medically related costs for as long as she needs (these people are amazing!!!) and Dr. Peter Grossman has committed to do the surgery. Without Dr, Peter and the foundation, she would not get the help she needs. Dr. Peter is considered one of the best burn surgeons in the country.  Their participation is living proof that Jesus loves the least of least - an orphan from China getting the best surgeon in the US - and maybe the world - to help her.  I confess - makes me cry every time I think of this for her - how very much she is loved by God. 

As we have begun to share this story with people, so many have asked "how can we help?".  There are going to be many needs as we walk this journey. First, foremost and most importantly, we need everyone to be in prayer. Our specific prayer requests are:

• for a smooth and lightening quick paperwork process
• for an easy transition for all the children involved 
• that all the financial needs will be met and the burn foundation would be blessed for helping
• that our family would be protected from the enemy during this time
• that Ai's heart would be prepared for the major changes she will be experiencing

We continue to be amazed at the way God is working in our lives. We are nothing special - the only notable thing about us is that in our brokenness, in our sinful state, God chooses to use us to show people His Kingdom - and for that we offer all the praises to Him and Him alone! 

Turns out we are reminded that God always has a plan - and it is always better than ours. 

Praise to be God! 

(we will share pictures of this treasure with you as soon as her paperwork is all final)